I'm so sorry Carolyn (and Daniel, too). I haven't been on lately, and I too, am late in reading this. I know that what Sarah says is true. You get to a place where memories can be happy. For a while after mom died, they were all sad, and very painful. Now, (three years later) I can have good memories and talk about mom. There are still times when pain pops up out of nowhere and I miss her like crazy (and I have to cry for a bit). Really there just gets to be a little more time between the tears. There are many of us on here who know what it is to lose a parent, and we're right here with you.
Prayers for you and your family as you go through these tough times.